The Gap and the Gain
Measure yourself against your past self, not your ideal future self.
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~weeks to results
- Steps
- 3
- Confidence
- 83%
The Gap and the Gain, from Taha's guest Benjamin Hardy, explains why ambitious people are unhappy: they measure themselves against a constantly moving future ideal, which keeps them in the gap, always feeling behind. The fix is to measure your current self against your past self, which puts you in the gain and reveals real progress. Taha's example is going from no podcast six years ago to a top-100 show, a 1,000x gain that makes her feel positive. But you shouldn't stay only in the past; the complete formula for being content and unanxious is a happy past plus an exciting future.
Origin
Taha learned this from organizational psychologist Benjamin Hardy on her podcast, and calls his episodes some of the most relevant content she teaches.
Core principles
- 01Measuring against a moving future ideal keeps you perpetually feeling like a loser.
- 02Measuring against your past self reveals how far you've come and feels good.
- 03Feeling positive about progress attracts more of it into your life.
- 04The full formula for contentment is a happy past and an exciting future.
How to run it
- 1
Catch the gap
Notice when you're measuring yourself against a future ideal, top competitor, or moving goalpost.
Watch out Living in the gap makes you feel like a loser no matter how much you achieve.
- 2
Switch to the gain
Compare your current self to your past self and name how far you've actually come.
Pro tip Concrete before-and-after markers make the gain vivid and motivating.
- 3
Balance past and future
Pair a happy, reframed past with an exciting future vision so you feel good and still grow.
Watch out Staying only in past-comparison too long can stall forward progress.
In the wild
Taha notes she's now a top-100 podcaster when six years ago she didn't even have a podcast, a 1,000x improvement she uses as gain thinking.
→ Recognizing the gain makes her feel positive and, she argues, attracts more success.
Common mistakes
Chasing moving goalposts
Each achieved goal spawns a bigger one, so measuring against the future keeps happiness permanently out of reach.
Living only in the gain
Dwelling on past progress without an exciting future vision removes the drive to keep improving.
Is it for you?
Best for
High achievers and entrepreneurs prone to feeling they're never doing enough.
Not ideal for
People who use past-comparison to become complacent and stop striving.
From the transcript
“if you're always measuring yourself against your future self... you're always in the Gap”
“you need to have a happy past and an exciting future that is the formula”
From the episode
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