From Unbearable to Unstoppable
Change a habit in three 10-day phases — unbearable, uncomfortable, unstoppable.
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~weeks to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 92%
From Unbearable to Unstoppable is Elrod's 30-day habit-change model, split into three 10-day phases. Days 1-10 are 'unbearable' because the habit is new and your identity is at stake ('I'm not a morning person / not a runner'). Days 11-20 are 'uncomfortable' — you're acclimating but it's still easier not to do it. Days 21-30 are 'unstoppable,' where resistance disappears and the habit becomes automatic and even enjoyable. Knowing the phases in advance is the key insight: because the brain assumes present discomfort is permanent, most people quit on day two or three. Understanding that the pain is a temporary 10-day phase lets you push through to automaticity.
Origin
Elrod studied habit formation and found the popular '21 days' claim (from Maxwell Maltz's 1968 Psychocybernetics) and the newer Harvard '66 days' figure. He concluded a habit takes however long you decide, settled on 30 days as his preferred approach, and structured it into three named 10-day phases based on his own experience training for a marathon.
Core principles
- 01A habit change takes however many days you decide it takes.
- 02The first 10 days feel unbearable because your identity is at stake.
- 03Naming the phases in advance defuses the resistance when it hits.
- 04The final 10 days reinforce the habit positively so it becomes automatic and enjoyable.
- 05The brain lives in the moment and wrongly assumes 'unbearable' lasts forever.
How to run it
- 1
Commit to 30 days no matter what
Frame the change as a three-step affirmation: 'I'm committed to this new habit for 30 days no matter what, there is no other option,' with your reasons and the specific actions you'll take.
Pro tip Publicly committing — like Pat Flynn did on-air — raises the stakes and follow-through.
- 2
Survive the Unbearable phase (days 1-10)
Expect the first 10 days to feel unbearable because the habit is new and threatens your identity. Remind yourself it's only a 10-day phase — you can do anything for 10 days if there's a payoff.
Pro tip Pre-labeling this phase means the discomfort confirms the plan instead of triggering a quit.
Watch out This is when most people quit, mistaking temporary difficulty for a permanent verdict on the habit.
- 3
Push through the Uncomfortable phase (days 11-20)
You start acclimating, but it's still easier not to do it. Keep going purely on the strength of your 30-day commitment.
- 4
Reach the Unstoppable phase (days 21-30)
Somewhere in this stretch the resistance disappears entirely — you just get up and do it without negative thoughts. The extra days beyond 21 reinforce the habit positively so it sticks and becomes enjoyable.
Pro tip The 21-day figure may implement a habit, but the final 10 days remove the resistance so you actually enjoy continuing.
In the wild
In the early days of run training Elrod battled constant negative talk — sore, no stamina, 'I can't do this.' By pushing through the phases, he reached a point where he'd get dressed, run, and finish without a single negative thought.
→ The habit became fully automatic and effortless — he had become 'unstoppable,' having acclimated so completely that resistance was gone.
Common mistakes
Quitting on day two or three
The brain lives in the moment and assumes 'this is what the habit will always feel like,' so people abandon it early instead of recognizing the discomfort as a passing 10-day phase.
Is it for you?
Best for
Anyone starting or breaking a habit who abandons it early when it feels hard and unnatural.
Not ideal for
People who need external accountability structures or are changing habits with medical or addiction complexity.
From the transcript
“The first 10 days of changing a habit can feel unbearable because it's new... The second 10day phase, days 11 through 20, or what I…”
“We don't we think unbearable is forever. We literally are like, oh, this is what running feels like... Never mind. I can't do this forever.…”
From the episode
Hal Elrod: Miracle Morning Habits for Peak Productivity and Business Success| Productivity| E354
Hal Elrod