The Four Pillars of Trust
Authenticity, vulnerability, transparency, consistency — give trust to get trust.
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~months to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 78%
Lederman treats trust as the foundation of relationship, resting on four pillars: authenticity, vulnerability, transparency, and consistency. The operating rule is reciprocal — you have to give trust to get trust. She specifically reframes vulnerability, insisting it is not weakness but openness, and that self-disclosure and vulnerability build credibility. The pillars connect to her openness work: sharing more of yourself expands what others know about you and deepens trust.
Origin
The four pillars appear in a dedicated trust chapter of The Connector's Advantage, tied to Lederman's broader work on likability and authenticity.
Core principles
- 01Trust is the foundation of relationship.
- 02You have to give trust to get trust.
- 03Vulnerability is not weakness — it is openness and it builds credibility.
- 04Trust rests on four pillars that reinforce each other.
How to run it
- 1
Authenticity
Be the real you — the same law of authenticity that underpins likability.
- 2
Vulnerability
Share more of yourself and be willing to be vulnerable, because vulnerability leads to credibility.
Pro tip Reduce what you hide by self-disclosing a little more to expand what others know about you.
Watch out Don't be afraid of vulnerability or mistake it for weakness.
- 3
Transparency
Be open about your intentions and information so there's nothing hidden that erodes trust.
- 4
Consistency
Behave reliably over time so people know what to expect from you.
In the wild
Lederman links trust to the Johari-window idea of self-disclosure: reducing what you hide by sharing a little more of yourself and being more vulnerable.
→ Greater self-disclosure builds the credibility that is one of the pillars of trust.
Common mistakes
Waiting to receive trust first
Trust is reciprocal — if you never extend it, you won't get it back, and the relationship stays shallow.
Guarding against vulnerability
Treating vulnerability as weakness blocks the openness and self-disclosure that actually build credibility and trust.
Is it for you?
Best for
Leaders and collaborators building durable, high-trust working relationships.
Not ideal for
Purely transactional, one-off exchanges where relationship depth is unnecessary.
From the transcript
“trust for me is the foundation of relationship and I talk about four pillars of trust authenticity... vulnerability transparency and consistency”
“you have to give trust to get Trust but don't be afraid of vulnerability it is not weakness it is openness”
From the episode
Michelle Tillis Lederman: Creating Connection, How to Build Strong Relationships in the Networking Age
Michelle Tillis Lederman